Intro
I wanna say "fuck you," but instead I have to say:
(spoken, polite) “As per my last email...”
“To reiterate:” You're stupid, a dumbass, a liability
But I have to cloak it in (crooning) civility
Chorus
Grit your teeth
Do the corporate speak
What they say has subtext underneath
Grit your teeth
Do the corporate speak
What they say has subtext underneath
Grit your teeth
Do the corporate speak
What they say has subtext underneath
Verse
“I CC’d you” means I brought a witness
For your little funny business
“Thank you for your input” means
No one fucking asked
“Let’s table that idea” means I think it’s fucking trash
“As a reminder,”—that one’s code
For read the damn memo, you lazy oaf
“Respectfully” softens the blow
But I’m imagining stabbing you slow
(mockingly) “In alignment with our goals”
This is making my social bandwith low
Is this Severance? It feels like hell
“Just circling back” means go fuck yourself
Bridge
(building in intensity, a little unhinged)
This meeting could’ve been an email
This email could’ve been a sigh
My soul’s on a Google Drive
And it's begging me to die
Verse
Check your slack
Don’t mix brown with black
Make sure your shoes and belt always match
Press your collar ‘til it’s flat
Squint your eyes when you laugh
Chorus
Grit your teeth
Do the corporate speak
What they say has subtext underneath
Grit your teeth
Do the corporate speak
What they say has subtext underneath
Grit your teeth
Do the corporate speak
What they say has subtext underneath
Outro
I never do this corporate drivel, so
They think I’m on my bitch shit
But I’m really just (crooning) autistic
Just to circle back
(Drum Kick!)